Missing Gram

I am not sure why I am missing my Grandma so much tonight but for some reason when I was rocking Paige tonight it hit me.....hard. At Gram's funeral the opening song was Amazing Grace and I have been singing that to Paige since August. When I rock her she loves that song,and I can usually get through it, but for some reason tonight I just couldn't. I don't know if it because I used to talk to Gram EVERY day and now I can't, if it is the upcoming family weddings that she will miss, if it is getting close to spring...her favorite time to plant flowers, if it that I can't tell her about our daily life and what the girls are up to, or if it just because I miss her like crazy! I think it is a little of all of it. My grandma was just diagnosed with cancer this month last year and now she is gone. I am glad she is not suffering anymore but I sure wish she was still here. This was the Eulogy Geoff wrote and read at her funeral...bless his heart. I can't even read through it some days and he delivered it so well. My grandma Rosie would have been so proud of him.

Rosalie Anne Rise

I’d like to start by saying how blessed I have been to join a great and loving family.

And I have been honored to speak on behalf Grandpa Ron, and Rosie’s children: Rhonda, Jim, Charlotte, and David, her 12 grandchildren, her 9 great-grandchildren, her brothers and sisters, and her countless friends to convey thoughts, memories, and thanks for Rosie and the lives we’ve lived together with her.

Rosalie Anne Rise was born April 7, 1938 to John and Alverda Hoke in Clintonville, West Virgina. She’s one of ten children; four boys: Shirley, Condol, Leroy and Dick; and six girls: Treva, Janet, Jean, Lois, Rosalie and Carol.

Rosie was 13 when she met Ronnie, who was 15, in 1951, at the Tualitin Crawfish Festival Dance. Five years later, after Ronnie got out of the service, they married in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho. During their 54-year marriage, they lived briefly in California, then returned to Oregon (so their children could live closer to their cousins), and they lived in North Portland, then Springfield, then, for the last eight years, they have enjoyed retirement together living in Scappoose.

Grandma Rosie is a model of joy, peace, and kindness, and a model of patience, love, and acceptance. Although I’m not sure if these were the traits that brought her to work for 30 years at the Department of Motor Vehicles or if that was the place where she learned and developed her notorious patience.

She has a miraculous way of listening, validating, and making you feel heard and cared for. To her family and close friends, she was the most loyal, forgiving, and concerned person we knew. She, often thought and worried, more about us and our troubles than we cared about them ourselves. Even in the worst days of cancer, she’d ask about her sister’s blood sugar, her grandchildrens’ activities, and her sons’ and daughters’ daily grinds. To ask, in return, how she felt, she’d reply, “I’m doing OK”, or if it was really bad, “Well, I’m not my best today” . . . and leave it at that.

Rosalie cherished the simple pleasures of life . . . things like Bob Seger’s Old Time Rock and Roll, a train ride on the Polar Express, a cigarette and a cup of coffee, a “spin” won on the Wheel of Fortune machine.

Some of her family’s best memories include:

· The way she related to children, and the love she has for them - especially her own children, her grandchildren, and by God’s grace and good fortune, her great grandchildren.

· Christmas, and decorating for Christmas.

· Hallmark ornaments for each of her grandchildren, and great-grandchildren

· 70% off Hallmark ornaments for each of her grandchildren

· Doing taxes by hand even in the 21^st century – there’s an amazing story from a few years back, where Jen and I raved to the Rises and the Durans about Turbo Tax and the refund we got. Grandma Rosie was, let’s just say, a little hesitant, to trust a computer to come up with the biggest refund. So for fun, she did her taxes, by hand; then after she was all finished, her forms complete and her refund calculated, she sat with Jen and ran the numbers and deductions with her at the computer, a second time, but using Turbo Tax, and when it was finished, and it spit out the exact same number, to the penny for the refund, she said . . . “Well . . . !!!”

Other memories of Rosie:

· Playing piano, guitar and flute

· Rosalie finally finding a use for the computer . . . Skype

· Outlet malls, discount racks, and Meier and Frank and Macy’s coupons

· Reminiscing with Grandpa Ron about games, friends, neighbors, and relationships that were born from Little League, wrestling, and high school sports.

· The smart shop, garage sale deals, and the endless pursuit of better discounts.

· Family birthdays, graduations, weddings, the annual family reunion, and, really, family and friends gathering together for any reason to celebrate

· Spring planting, hanging flower baskets, and gardening

· Driver’s licenses issued to most of the adults in North Portland, and big rig behind-the-wheel driving examinations

· Thanksgiving dinner – I remember my first Rise family Thanksgiving and Joe telling me to watch Grandma Rosie eat, he told me I wouldn’t believe what I’d see . . . he’d swear she has a hollow leg . . . that there’s no other way she could eat that much and stay her size.

· Rosalie’s expression the day Grandpa Ron won $25K on a scratcher he got for his birthday as a present from Aunt Carol and Uncle Wayne

· The daily phone calls from her daughters and granddaughters – I know for us that was a big reason we went with the Family Share Plan and the 2500 minutes.

· Uncontrollable and contagious fits of laughing and giggling.

· Her fear of flying, but her eagerness to be first to climb into the van for a two-week drive that went from Scappoose, to Eugene, to Canyonville, to Redding, to Woodland, to Reno, to Concord, to Phoenix, and back . . . Yet another example of her love of family, fun, and adventure, and a testimony to her . . . patience . . . as a passenger.

And some last memories . . .

· Rosalie’s joy for the births into the family and her joy for our journeys in our own marriages, families, and friendships

· Her support and love as we have and raise our children

· Grandma Rosie’s longing to be surrounded by people, and to have company

· Her compassion as we’ve dealt with tragedies and sorrows

· Rosie’s appreciation and love for those of you, her angels – especially her sister Carol – and all of those who were able to be with her in last months and days as she battled cancer and treatment.

. . . now, that’s a list to name just a few of our best days and memories with Rosalie.

In her conversations with Carol, Charlotte, David, Jim, Rhonda, Ron and others over the last months, Rosalie conceded all the things she’ll miss, many on the horizon in the near future: births, weddings, achievements . . . parties . . . Thanksgiving . . . shopping the day after Thanksgiving . . . . . Christmas.

In closing . . . it’s impossible to deny the sadness and loss. Rosie meant the world to many people here today. Remember, though, as we’ve joined together to celebrate Rosalie’s life, we’re better people from seeing her model how to love.

We should each pray to take in a sliver of her heart, and be, in many ways, more like her. Have her model and guide the way we convey our loyalty, our love, our patience and acceptance, and our forgiveness as each of us go forward and try our best to make her proud.